Above eight years ago now, I came to a place in my life where I was really stuck. Having reached a point of extreme frustration, I tearfully prayed on my knees beside my bed, crying out to the Lord for relief. That was a pivotal moment, one I hope you will be able to benefit from as I have.
I had been struggling for many months with two looming monsters in my life. 1. Divorce. 2. Bankruptcy. It was so firmly in my mind that if I held out and did my honest best to hang in there that somehow the Lord would see me through to what I envisioned as success. I really wanted my relationship with my wife to be restored and better than before. Also, I wanted very badly to have the opportunity to manage my financial responsibilities without having to declare bankruptcy. I viewed both of these potential outcomes, divorce and bankruptcy, as personal failure and scenarios that would bring shame upon the Lord I claimed to serve. It was my firm conviction that divorce and bankruptcy were contrary to the Lord's will.
Something very profound occurred to me as I cried out in anguish that morning. I had never considered that He might actually consent to my divorce and bankruptcy. I had never thought to ask Him about His will. I was immediately prompted by the Lord, so I proceeded to ask very deliberately the following simple questions. Lord is it your will for me to give my consent for and accept this divorce? Lord, is it your will for me to accept this bankruptcy? I knew even as I asked these questions what the answers were, feeling immediate relief from the many months of stress that had built up inside me. The peace I had lost began to return. When I was finally willing to seek His will sincerely, without concern for what the answers might be, I had the answers I needed. Contrary to what I had long presumed, it was clearly His will for me to accept both the divorce and bankruptcy.
That observation may shock some of you but other's will find my testimony consistent with personal experience.
In language familiar to those of you who know the way of intercessors, I had come to a death in these matters. Nothing of my own was retained, nothing more in which to be proud remained.
Where this breakthrough experience led me to was divorce and bankruptcy, of course, but beyond that there came some unexpected blessing. There was the obvious benefit of having my eyes opened to how I had been deceived by the professing church instead of actually seeking the Truth for my guidance. That was an important lesson in my life about not blindly following the model of the professing church, and another, too, was about the importance of asking without having a leaning or predisposition towards one answer or another. What was really unexpected and MOST WELCOME was how a very troubling and bewildering array of things I had observed as though in shadow was about to be brought into the light!
Later that day or possibly the next day I received a book in the mail, one I had ordered a few days earlier. At the time I ordered it, I had no idea the book might be related to my breakthrough but, when I started to read, it quite obviously was. Funny how the Lord works, sometimes. The book was titled "Unmasking the Jezebel Spirit" by John Paul Jackson. This was my first exposure to such a work, and I was, fair to say, stunned by what I read. Much of what he documented I recognized, having seen it played out very particularly. There was plenty of overlap in our experience. I had no idea the collection of things I'd observed was actually a common set. This was quite a revelation to me, which the Lord validated over the next few days and weeks fairly dramatically through independent means.
I have much more to share about what I've learned since then, and what circumstances led up to that pivotal crisis in my life. What I expect to be focused on, though, is the humility and obedience that is the foundation for our defense and offense against this destructive and deceitful scheme of control spirits, including Jezebel.
Here's a few resources I'm familiar with enough to generally recommend. If you know of others and can attest to their value, please suggest them in comments to this post, for everyone's benefit.
Unmasking the Jezebel Spirit - John Paul Jackson
Jezebel - Seducing Goddess of War - by Jonas Clark
Confronting Jezebel - Discerning and Defeating the Spirit of Control - Steve Sampson
Tim Mather - Out of Bondage
The Three Battlegrounds - Francis Frangipane
The Jezebel Spirits Helpers, Messengers, Slaves and Eunuchs by Jonas Clark
[PDF] The Spirit of Jezebel
[video] Discerning The Jezebel Spirit - All four parts of this video were presented in a post a few days ago.
[video] How the Jezebel Spirit Makes Eunuchs - by Jonas Clark
There are many more by Jonas Clark on YouTube, and I thought each one I watched was valuable.
Jezebel, in our society [added on 12/2/10]
The "Drama Triangle" or "Karpman Drama Triangle" - Persecutor/Victim/Rescuer Role-shifting model
Karpman drama triangle
The Rescue Triangle "or the art of being in charge of yourself and not controlling other people
The Drama Triangle by Steve Karpman with Comments by Patty E. Fleener M.S.W.